It is the 6th of January. Every year I use the 2 weeks from the holidays to make ambitious plans for the new year. A lot of these plans often get into the trash bin by end of January with a dismissive wave of the hand, meant to say ” Pfff, I don`t know what I was thinking…I have to juggle a demanding job and raising teenagers. I have no time for taking care of health or passion projects( read : myself) ” But this year I decided it will be different.
I did a few things differently this year : 1.Reorganized my value system. That sounds awfully vague, I know. Till a couple of years ago, every time someone talked about values, I zoned out. It was abstract( meaning I could only hear “blah blah blah”), I was not sure what it will do to help me with goals, so never bothered. Last year, I joined a few like-minded people, forming a small community that would support each other with the goals we want to achieve in 2020. Little did we know that we could not have picked up a better year, but that is a different story. So, one of the first things we did in January, was redefining our values. Yours truly begrudgingly decided to sit down and do it, as everyone else was sharing theirs. It was the best 30 min I have spent in 2020. You can find a list with values on the internet easily. Then pick up the 10 most important values to you and then try to arrange them in priority order for you. The catch? Don`t put what “should” be your value, but the values that are truly important to you. For me, as I am very overweight, I always had health and losing weight as a “should” versus “want”. And it never took me very far, actually not true, took me for a long guilt trip ride. This year, I put Health as number 1 value, because I truly want to make a change and am actually excited to see how this goes. It took 10 years, but hey, better late than never.
2. Make small, manageable goals as a start. So, usually as a life coach, I help clients make their Big Goals. That is the goal you are super excited about, but then we spend time working on breaking that goal into small, manageable bits, so each day you can do something and feel you are inching towards your goal. For example, big goal can be becoming fit, but small goal can be dress up in gym clothes every day and then slowly build momentum over time. “Atomic Habits” by James Clear is an amazing book that explains it all in detail. My big goal is losing 40 pounds, but small goal is doing 5 min of exercise in January and then, see how I feel about increasing the time or intensity.
3. Being mindful and staying in the present : I consider this to be the point that would make the biggest difference
- Observe thoughts and change course if I spiral into negativity or worry
- Gratitude journaling ( ideally on paper, but could be mental notes as well)
- Positive self-talk and daily self-care ( the missing piece of the puzzle, as I am a guilt trip world champion)
Find a way to depict your new year resolution, which is exciting for you, full of “want” and no “should”.
Which brings me to the last point: 4. Gamify your new year resulution
Are you having fun? Do you know that we are made of stardust, the same material as the sun? Do you think we were born to work and eat and sleep and repeat it all again? For everyone who is reading this, here is my new year present for you and you can quote me as your life coach:
We all deserve to have fun and peace in the new year. We all have our duties and responsibilities, but we need a balance. Being an adult does not mean that you cannot have or only have scheduled fun. Prescription: Do something that is exciting or brings you peace every day in 2021 and contact me to let me know what changed in 2021 for you.
Now, I hope this brought you some excitement and tingling about 2021 and what you can change to make you feel alive each and every day. We all have complete control over our lives. We think it is easier to blame others or circumstances for this or that, but that actually makes us powerless. Taking back control of our lives and changing the narrative makes us aware that we have the power to change each and every day to live a full life. We can choose our reaction to other people or external circumstances, but that is for another day.
Dream big, pursue your dreams, find your purpose, enjoy life : whatever it is, you deserve it. Go get`em!
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